Permitted to remain is a photo journal zine chronicling my attempt at migrating to Ireland. I was granted three years to stay, but left after three months, unable to navigate the challenges of unaffordable housing and inaccessible healthcare. This zine is a document of that time in my life.
The photos were mostly taken in County Donegal, where we spent most of our time. The excerpts (edited by Nine) are drawn from my blog, repurposed to give voice to this compilation.
Reader’s tip: Pair with dark by 4:30—a playlist I put together while battling the frustrations of migration and the cold, short, gloomy days in Ireland.
The digital version is now available for viewing here.
The physical edition will be available for purchase in early 2025, with all profits going to Garabtaag, a collective of volunteers assisting refugees in Malaysia. Your support for this project will be channelled directly to refugees for housing, healthcare, and basic living expenses.
Reach out to me directly if you want to reserve one: hello.alsiew@gmail.com
I’ve been helping my neighbour feed her cats and water her one (1) plant while she’s away.
Neighbour as in she lives just two doors away from our building and one time when we had big scary insect problems in our apartment, we called her for help. She didn’t come to our rescue but did offer her cats because and I quote “Momo is good hunter”.
Neighbour as in some times when I hear loud noises coming from upstairs, I text her to ask if she could hear it too. Neighbour as in when there’s leftover beer from entertaining guests, she offers it to me because she doesn’t drink. Neighbour as in when there’s a power cut, we ask if she wanted to have dinner somewhere together while we wait for the lights to come back on.
Is this what it feels like to live in a time before we were all so guarded, wary, and suspicious?
We never expected to make friends with any neighbours. High-rise living in KL has made us sceptical about having any sort of interaction with people who live in the same building, let alone on the same street.
Modern living definitely plays a role in our anti-social behaviours and this is true anywhere. Malta is not exempt but people here do live closer to the ground. You’re more likely to see people out and about, and towering stickle-brick buildings aren’t as common.
Our friendship with our neighbour only happened because we found her lost cat in our apartment. We’d seen a cat from two doors down hanging out on the balcony, so when we stumbled upon Momo in our building, Nine had a hunch it was the same one. She swiftly rushed over, going door-to-door looking for Momo’s owner.
It was a chance encounter but I would attribute that to us living somewhere where it was possible to notice your neighbour’s balconies and take an interest in their lives.
We became instant friends after. Our neighbour even gave Nine the title “Momo lifesaver” whenever she introduced her to others. Now, whenever Mimi goes out of town, we look after her cats.
As I stand in her kitchen, watching the cats eat, I can’t help but feel like our life in Malta is something out of a movie. After all, I can’t recall a time when I was this involved with a neighbour.
Running shoes I got into serious running towards the end of last year, dedicating about 30 minutes to each run, three times a week. Being quite prone to notions, I hesitated to invest in proper running shoes until I was certain that running would become a consistent part of my routine. During this time, I made do with my hiking shoes, but their weight wasn’t ideal for my ankles. It wasn’t until the day before my second 5k race that I finally decided to purchase a pair of Hoka Clifton 9s. I figured completing two races was a significant commitment to warrant new shoes. The experience of running in them was blissful – it felt like gliding on clouds and with them I hit a new personal best.
Small pan Too much hassle to wash a big pan just to fry a single egg. Surprisingly though the small pan has also been great for cooking most meals for two.
Journal Over the last couple of years, I’ve been committed to journaling in a passport-sized Traveler’s Notebook as a way to encourage the habit. Choosing a smaller journal was deliberate on my part. The blank pages of larger journals felt intimidating and made it harder to be consistent. The shift to smaller notebooks erased the fear of putting pen to paper, gradually replaced by a growing desire to write more. Opted for a dotted Leuchtturm1917 in a size B6 to explore this newfound enthusiasm. So far so good!
Kindle I’ve had a Kindle 10th Gen since 2020 and I’ve noticed a significant uptick in my reading habits since adding this device to my life. Lately, though, it’s been showing signs of lag and occasional unresponsiveness even after freeing up storage. Not enough to justify an upgrade but definitely one of those things I would easily replace if it ever decides to completely give up on me.
Blender Nine and I lived without one for many years but we thought why deprive ourselves of smoothies any longer.
Japanese mug My morning coffee is a daily ritual and it just doesn’t feel right if it’s not in my own mug. I didn’t bring one with me when I left Malaysia. I never anticipated how much of a difference it would make when you find yourself far from everything familiar, and your only source of comfort is the assurance that your mug will be there each morning. The same mug you’ve been using since you moved out of your family home. Not wanting to settle for just any mug, I decided I’d find something special during a visit to Nine in Geneva. There, I found a store offering an assorted range of Japanese art and housewares, including beautifully hand-painted mugs. Many of the patterns looked similar but none two were completely alike. Whichever one I chose, there would not be another of its kind. I left with two of what I thought would look great as a pair. These mugs now hold new memories for us, one we can cling to no matter where life takes us.
Tiny spatula Before I even got the small pan, Nine bought me a tiny, beveled spatula, and it turned out to be the perfect companion. I’ve never quite figured out the purpose of the beveled part, but using it has been a joy for almost everything in the kitchen. Well, almost everything – it’s not the best for flipping a fried egg. Burned my fingers a few times trying to rescue the egg from slipping off the spatula.
Monitor There is life before a monitor and after a monitor and once you know what that’s like, it really is impossible to go back to relying solely on the laptop screen. One of the first few items I acquired after my first internship paycheque so that I can work better so that my work is better so that work will keep paying me.
Running cap This one was a bit of a splurgy purchase but honestly blown away by Ciele’s quality and design. Fits my head perfectly, wears comfortably, no trapped heat issues, and does an excellent job at keeping the sweat from dripping down my face. Totally worth it!
Bus card Pay €17 for the card once and never worry about bus fares again, no matter where you need to go in the country. I’ve gotten so much use out of it that it took me less than three months to feel like I got my money’s worth. Malta being as small as it is, most things happen in the city, so there are plenty of buses heading that way. It’s super convenient, especially since I don’t drive here. Free public transportation really makes it easy to show up for things.
mostly earnest 